sadness, (literally) in a fog, and hope

So my date never happened. It's such a long story that in a nutshell it is: My boyfriend is an illegal immigrant from St. Lucia (I've always known about this but I didn't think it would ever matter because he was in the process of getting his papers and such), on his way up from Florida to visit they did a random search of the Greyhound bus he was on and he got caught, he's now sitting in holding in Buffalo (New York), it's going to cost $5000 to get him out, his older brother is trying to get the money and a lawyer because my boyfriend didn't do anything wrong at all and has never broken the law or been in any sort of trouble in his whole life, and I AM FREAKING OUT!
He was supposed to arrive here on Christmas Eve and call me as soon as he stepped off the bus...that never happened. And he wasn't answering my calls or texts. So needless to say I was a little worried. Fastforward to Christmas...I can barely keep from crying and finally call his aunt and she tells me everything that happened. I cry even more because I feel like its my fault he's there; I'm the main reason he was coming up to New York to visit. But I know that I shouldn't blame myself for what happened and that getting upset about it wont change anything.
I finally got to talk to him yesterday though! He's only allowed to call one number(his brother, the one who's trying to get him out), so they called me on a 3way (pretty awkward lol). He sounded ok actually, he said that everything is going to be ok, and that he's going to call me again soon. I can't wait for that phonecall.

So until them I am trying to keep myself occupied.

Christmas went pretty well, I got almost everything I wanted (: Including some new red lipstick from Benefit! :D I love it!


Also on Christmas, my parents and I went to my aunts house for dinner. I know when I have a boyfriend that being asked for my number by a really hot guy shouldn't make me happy, but it really did...A LOT! No, he's not related to me at all lol but he's my cousin's boyfriends cousin. How complicated is that? But his name is Wajeeh and he's sooooooooo gorgeous. But so is Irvin(my boyfriend). But hey, everyone needs a compliment now and then (;

On Sunday I went to this really nice resort/casino thing not far from my house with my parents and we had a really nice lunch. We left at like 9:30 in the morning and when I walked out the door this is the sight that greeted me!



:D ♥ I adore weak morning light

Then yesterday I did absolutely nothing and it was great. It snowed a ton and it was so pretty that I had to take some pictures.




And today one of my bestfriends from school, Carley, came over for a bit. We ate cheese puffs, sat around and made silly videos, and just generally had fun.
Right now I'm listening to Coldplay, wondering if Irvin will be able to call me, and waiting for my annoying little cousin to get here :P